Day 87 ~ Going to the Movies

There are tons of things to do on a cruise ship. One of the options is watching movies, either in the Cabaret Lounge or on the TV in our stateroom the day after the show runs in the Lounge. (FYI, we sort of prefer seeing it on our TV. Unless you are lucky enough to snag one of the few front row seats in the Cabaret Lounge, you’ll be watching the screen through a sea of heads. If I could improve the Pacific Princess, adding a bit of a slant to the seating in the Cabaret Lounge would top the list.)

We’ve seen some good movies during sea days on board. Wonder and Darkest Hour were my favorites. Captain Phillips is a very engaging story, and who’s more watchable than Tom Hanks, but I’m glad they showed it AFTER we came through the “high risk” area around Somalia. I’m looking forward to seeing The Shape of Water tomorrow.

But there’s one movie that stole a couple hours of my life I’ll never get back. It’s called Three Billboards outside Ebbing, Missouri. I was initially excited about this one, because we live in the Ozarks, and the gently rolling green hills in the opening moments of the movie certainly spoke to me of home.

Then the characters started speaking.

Honestly, it they cut every F-Bomb from the script, the movie would only be 20 minutes long. It wasn’t just the shag-nasty characters we’re supposed to love to hate who had potty mouths. Every single character was crude. Even in relationships that were supposedly happy, they swore at each other almost constantly, as if vulgarity was a term of endearment.

Why? Just...why?

Then there were my writerly difficulties with the story. Only one character had what we call a “growth arc,” which means whoever they were at the beginning, they’re a different person by the end of the story. They’ve grown and changed in ways we wish we could.  Unfortunately, it wasn’t the main character, the one with whom we're supposed to identify, who experienced this metamorphosis.

It was Dickson, a brutal, vicious, barely-able-to-form-complete-sentences cop. He beats up black people, and throws a gay guy out a second story window. Then after his mentor commits suicide, the note he leaves to Dickson changes him out of all knowing. He’s suddenly selfless. Smart. Determined to find the guy who killed and raped the daughter of the woman who put up the billboards the movie is named for. Dickson’s transformation is sudden and sweeping…and totally unbelievable.

By the time this sorry tale ground to an end, nothing had been resolved. No killer was caught. No one found peace. Except maybe us. We were relieved that it was over.

How about you? Is there a movie you wish you could “un-watch?”